now i truely understand this.. my family have encounter lots of problem recently.. all because of my dad.. i tot tat i finally solve the problem.. but.. like what the phrase said.. no matters how one person change, the character wun change..

my dad owe a lot of debt.. loanshark la.. various bank la.. owe 40-50k of debt.. after i calculated, 1 month need to pay at least $2.5k to pay off the debt.. and in about 2-3 years everything will clear.. i finally get a job at McDonald.. can get $1.6k per month.. so i told my dad tat i will fork out 1k to help him pay his debt.. den bro can also help out a little.. since they dun earn much.. maybe $400 per person.. and with my dad own salary, we, as a family, can pay off the debt.. we will suffer maybe the 1st year or so.. but i tot we are a family.. we can pull thru this TOGETHER! but it seem like everything is just a dream..

i talked to him earlier on.. he promise me tat before the debt is clear, he will NOT gamble.. den i say 4D also cannot.. but den he argue.. saying that 4D must buy.. den i said that "fine.. but not more den $5 per number.." he agreed to it.. and after a few days only.. i found out that he spend $100+ on 4D just for that 1 day!! i was shock.. i went shouted at him asking why.. mom help him explain also.. i give face to my mom.. so i let it go.. he buy so much coz he WRITE WRONGLY!!! who will believe tat nonsense!!

so after tat.. i found him buying 4D at $20+ per number.. i ask him why again.. he never say anything.. den i tell him that cannot buy so big!! the most $5.. he always "ya la ya la" smile and go away.. the gambling habit of his wun change.. and i think forever wun change..

i do everything i can to save this family from breaking apart.. but it dun seem to be the case.. my dad never learn his lesson.. that face when he promise me.. is filled with guilt.. filled with sadness and nothing-i-can-do.. i tot u bring him light and save him.. in the end?? i think he just take me for granted..

today, i found out that he went gambling... the point of time when i heard this.. my heart is dead.. he break the promise.. i cannot take it when someone promise me yet he cannot fulfilled what he promise.. i called him to come back home immediately or i go downstair and pull him home.. he took a long time to come home.. so i went downstair.. saw him walking slowly with his bunch of friends.. he always hang out with them!! i shouted at him in front of his friends.. i will not give him any more face.. i had give him enough chances... he dun appreciate it.. so be it.. i shouted from downstair to home.. we had a big fight..

i question him.. WHY! WHY! WHY! why he break the promise.. why he went to gamble.. again and again i saw disappointment in my mom face.. i cant count the number of time my mom give me tat kind of look.. why he wan to gamble??? why he wan to break the promise?? didnt we come to a deal that he cannot gamble until the debt is cleared?? why he gamble again?? i shouted at him.. but he just kept quiet and ignore me.. end up?? he threw his mobile phone on the floor and shouted back at me.. "DUN SHOUT LA!!".. well.. why dun shout?? he scare ppl hear?? scare ppl kw he break a promise?? scare ppl know tat he gamble so horribly??

since he like to sell hse so much.. go ahead, i told him.. u wan to divorce.. u wan to sell hse.. go ahead.. go and do it NOW!!! end up?? he only kw how to run away from problem.. den ask me go and die.. fine.. i open the window ledge, almost jump off my hse.. and?? he dun care.. he dun care even if i die.. he dun care who am i.. he just ask me go and die..

i did not jump.. coz i see my mom face.. i told my dad.. u used to dote me the most.. and now?? u break the promise that u made with me.. he simply ask me to dun care him.. who am i to him.. I AM UR DAUGHTER!! but he simply hack care.. he only kw how to run away from problem.. we quarrel so much until we almost fight... he eventually push me out of the room.. my bro came to protect me.. my dad so big size.. if he hit me, i definitely will die!! end up he just BUANG the door.. i cried.. so wat if i cried.. everytime when i was scolding him about his gambling habit.. my leg shaken.. i was so scare.. but nobody knew i was scare.. i told myself that i need to be firm.. so i just let it go.. say whatever i wan.. i asked him what he wan? what he wan den he wun gamble.. he just kept quiet.. since he like to gamble so much.. i took out all my money from my wallet and throw towards him.. "since u like to gamble so much.. this $60 u go and gamble.." i really dun kw wat to do anymore..

after all these fight, mom went and calm him down.. and ask him why he wanna break the promise when he cannot fullfilled?? den mom said that she go and ask the neighbour ah huey and ask her come and talk.. but dad came out and is so furious!! he said if mom go, he will smash everything in the hse.. smash the tv.. smash everything.. well.. he is threatening her.. mom eventually did not go.. have to save the furniture and tv!! so mom did not go lo.. and now?? dad run away from the problem.. den he went out lo.. slam the door.. and gone.. i hope he never come back again..

not long ago.. police came and catch people that gamble.. some were captured, some were not.. and got one time, the police came to my dad fren hse and capture everybody.. coz they were gambling inside.. gambling in a house is illegal.. the wife was the one gambling.. the husband was sleeping in his room.. but because is their hse.. both of them will fine.. they cannot afford to pay the fine.. end up?? they were jailed.. they take turn to be jailed.. my dad said that he went to visit the wife first.. the wife was jailed first.. and he said that the wife was crying very badly.. inside is very dark.. u dun kw is day time or night time.. dad say tat he learn his lesson.. wun gamble anymore.. coz dun wan to be jailed.. but.. u kw.. it has become his habit.. he still gamble.. he will never learn his lesson..

tat time when i say i give him one last chance.. he promise not to gamble.. i heard him talking to his fren on the phone abt it.. i heard him saying that his daughter wan him to become a gd boy.. he will not gamble.. he will change.. he was smiling there.. i really tot he change.. but.. haiz..

i declared that from today onwards i do not have a father anymore.. i gonna break all tie from him..