well.. dun really kw what to write today... my mood today is totally unknown... i feel very lost today... dun kw what is happy.. what is sad... like a living undead... with no emotional.. and everything.. but what i kw is.. my nose still a bit block.. den.. keep on coughing... whole day coughing non-stop... also dun kw what the hell happening to me... what i kw is.. i dun drink water le... when i was little.. i always drink water.. but now... dun even drink... haiz...

hmmmm... whole day never eat le.. only have a little bit of food nia... no wonder my gastric problem back la... haiz.... tml got work... sian... work morning... haiz... i feel tat i cannot work morning.. coz.. sure sick... i found out tat whenever i work morning, i will caught a flu... den will sick for a few day... me now.. flu abt to recover liao.. but.. cough.... haven...

today, i took out my vcd and watched... it seem like these few day, i keep on watching vcd... today, i took liu xin hua yuan cartoon de and watched... hmmm... very nice... sometime i thinking... will there be anyone like dao ming shi at there protect me?? haha... well.. sometime all these drama will coz me a lot of trouble.. coz.. i will be thinking here and there... whenever i watched a drama, i will be super emotional... expecially love one... i sure cry till siao... coz.. very touching... haha... i like taiwan drama a lot le... coz very nice.. and always give me the feeling... a feeling that i dun kw how to say... haha..

hmmmmm... my mother bought something for me... haha... after i bath.. smell so good.. one of my greatest wish is to have a milk bath.. haha.. well... must have a bathtub de.. but.. my body so long... also dun have my length la!!! haiz... hmm.. nvm!!! take it as a Dai Ti Ping!!! smell so good!!! but.. must put under my nose i den can smell it.. coz my nose... block!!!!! T.T

tat feeling is gone le... since tat time... gone le... i tot it have come back liao... but today.. whole day feel so.... lost... feel so lonely... as if i am the only person in this world... i can't feel anyone around me.. even if someone is around me, i dun have any sense of living... everything like... dead... these few day.. i felt hurt.... but... dun wish to say out... i dun kw what i thinking.. what i doing also... everything is so.... different... i started to imagine things... started to talk to myself... started to change into the ruby tat shut herself up in the door... i have walk out of tat door.. and taste the world... now... gone back in again... i was wondering, should i or should i not??? i dun kw how.. it seem like i always trap here and there... walk here and there... and.. things keep on repeating.. and ending all the same.. i am too tired of the same ending all over again and again and again... it torture me so much... i still have to continue to go on my life.. and.. the biggest step is poly.... once step out, there is no turning back... i must be prepared... but.. i am not... i am totally shut down...

*cough cough cough* oh man!!! i keep on coughing.. wun stop... i gonna die soon... haiz... touch wood touch wood... well.. today i done one thing... one thing tat i dun kw i will do it!!! well... nvm.... nth... haiz.. i go slp liao.. working at 9am... haiz...